Still Here? Happy New Year!

Posted on: 20 Jan 2020

Still here?

If you are, thank you for bearing with me and a Happy 2020 to all of my blog readers.

I can only apologise for my lack of posting (the reasons for which will become apparent) but as you can see from the above pic (Merry New Year!) I have been waddling along in the background, continuing my training to get me to the London Marathon start line in 2020.

IF you like my inane ramblings, I'm able to update Instagram much quicker and you can find me there as @tubbyrunster (https://www.instagram.com/tubbyrunster/).

So, I'm Still Here But How's It Going?
 

Well, much water has gone under the bridge since we last spoke and just for starters I have bid an emotional farewell to my trusty Brooks trainers....

....and hello to my new Asics:

I don't see my role as 'Morissey The Consumer Monkey' or an 'Insta Influencer' (I don't have enough followers for a start) but suffice to say that I'm not yet a fan of my new Asics. They were cheap at just £35 and I've yet to fully wear them in but I feel like I'll be going back to the Brooks as it currently stands. There's nothing technically wrong with them....they just don't FEEL as good. Watch this space and let's see how it goes.

Right, consumer advice aside, I have both good & bad news and (in the words of Haley Joel Osment in 'The Sixth Sense', 'I'm ready to tell you my secret now'. 

Let's start with the good news eh? Amongst the Christmas and New Year debauchery I didn't miss a single run.....not one and yes, I feel I deserve a medal (just like Muttley the dog, one of my childhood heroes).

I even managed to not miss a run whilst I was away visiting family down south so yeah, 2 medals please! I think the highlight of these runs was a 7.3 mile effort to a 'Winter Wonderland' at a Garden Centre to meet family (who had rather lazily driven there). Extra Brucie bonus points were earned by me when, even after a 7.3 mile run, I took to the ice with my daughters AND managed not to break my neck:

You're now (kinda) up to speed with where I'm at but the bad news (and my secret) is this; I'm having real problems and a battle royal with anxiety & depression. Some days are worse than others but recently the bad has outweighed the good by some margin. It's very hard to train for a marathon when some days it takes nearly all of my strength just to get out of bed in the morning :( 

Despite this (and on a really bad day of depression) I managed to pull off my longest run to date on the 12th January at 12 miles!

I was particularly pleased with this performance because when I woke that morning I barely had the (emotional) strength to lift my head from the pillow. To shrug it off and pull a 12 mile run out of the bag took a huge effort of which I'm proud.

Sadly, that's where the good news ends and since then I have struggled to do more than a couple of runs worthy of mention. Just yesterday I failed to do a scheduled run of 10 miles due to the depression and quite frankly, as I type this, I'm absolutely gutted about it. I let the demons win and I'm more than a little deflated.

BUT....

even though the demons won last week's battles they will NOT win the war. This week is a fresh start and I'll be back out for a short run tomorrow and hopefully then getting back to following my plan with as little negative impact as possible.

Keep on running folks and hopefully my next post will be more triumphant!

Peace & love,

Andy x

#londonmarathon #vlm2020 #marathontraining #tubbyrunster #teamorange #musculardystrophyuk #virginlondonmarathon #anxiety #depression #everymindmatters #blackdog #theblackdog

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