Setting my intention.

Posted on: 02 Jan 2016

happy 2016 all!

It is with a full belly and some generally exhausted kidneys that I say goodbye festivities and hello marathon training.

Training to commence tomorrow, the first 8 mile slog of the journey.

With last years marathon firmly in the back pocket and seeming like a distant memory, I am arming myself with thermal base layers, anti chafing cream, anti blister socks and my inspiring array of fellow long run scamperers to get me through another 16 weeks of pain, injury, laughs and memory making.

Again I will be running for a charity and raising lots of much needed funds for the English federation of disability sport. Always a good motivator to get your backside out of bed on a Sunday morning when it's -4 and you really don't want to run for 3 hours.

So while I'm writing my training plan. I'm asking myself, what's my other motivation or goal for the next 16 weeks? 

Sure, I love the outdoors and keeping fit and healthy. But that's seldom enough to keep you going when the miles increase and the temperature drops.

This leads me on to drawing my attention inward. Figuring out, that I run for my sanity.

Not a lot of people would know. But I suffer with quite bad anxiety. For which i take medication and have been through the mill of therapists, accupunturists, hypnotherapy, reiki. Name it, I've probably tried it and have a lovely selection of t shirts to prove it.

I seldom advertise this fact about myself.

Why? Because any type of condition that involves the mind is often met with sarcasm, derogatory comments and a general lack of understanding or a misconception, that what I must be is either weak or attention deprived. I am none of these things.

Im not courageous and I don't consider myself any different than any person stood next to me who has their own demons to abolish.

I do however, refuse to be weakened by this current state of mind nor will I ever be defined by it. I choose to get out of bed. See the day. Run for miles. Smile, laugh, love, dance, discover, cry, enjoy, endure and flourish.

I am not weaker or stronger than the next person. I am just me.

The miles I run are for my own peace.

The money I raise along the way is a bonus.

So quite simply put, my marathon focus this year is going to be, quite selfishly, me.

I choose not to be over come by my mind or my worries. I choose that I will

overcome them. And bag myself another medal at the finish line.

 

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