More Anxiety and Borderline Madness
Apr2120105:12 p.m.
Last night was not a good night. Firstly daughter number one flew into the bedroom at 2am, deposited her clock on me and disappeared again. Who knows why it was offending her, she normally loves it. Then daughter number two had a shout at 3am about her door not being in the right place - I really must remember to measure the gap she is happy with so I know exactly where to place it. Finally another anxiety dream struck, well two actually but only one was marathon related. I was trying to get to the Expo and was late, I was racing up and down escalators in the underground not knowing where to go. I found it just as it was closing and persuaded them to let me in, only to realise I had left my passport and entry form at home - so no marathon! The other dream involved goldfish as you can probably guess. I won't go into the tragic details but suffice to say it involved a bath, goldfish, someone letting the plug out and me frantically trying to catch them before they all disappeared, which they inevitably did after biting me first. Am I emotionally scarred I wonder?
The madness continued with a sudden and uncontrollable sobbing fit after hearing Radio 5's marathon advert. The sound of John Inverdale talking about pain and the real human race was too much. Then on my way into nursery with my daughter I met a distressed mum who had just left her son there for his first day. I listened to her and then sobbed with her and we consoled each other. I didn't have the heart to tell her I was still moved by John Inverdale and not her son. But I seemed to cheer her up.
So feeling somewhat tired and emotional, I managed to get out for a run in the sun this morning. While there has been a lot of talk of hot hot hot for Sunday, here there is a cool breeze so I ran with my jacket this morning thinking I wasn't really going to be out long enough to warm up. And so it turned out, my planned 4 turned into 3.5 because I just couldn't get going. These short ones really seem harder to get going with than the long ones. But I did manage a pace of 9.50 m/m which felt very easy so I am pleased with that, but my rhythm just wasnt really there.
Tonights excitement will be a sports massage, in the comfort of my living room. After reading such tales of pain, pummelling and screaming out loud I am wondering why I am putting myself at her mercy. But then everyone seems to rave about them, so why not. Pain is temporary afterall (John Inverdale again!). I am wondering if I should warn the neighbours though, in case of screaming. I still remember my midwife being horrified when I had my second baby at home, and I told her I hadn't warned the neighbours. Goodness I was in labour, I couldn't be expected to remember everything! I can't have screamed too loudly as the police didn't turn up expecting a domestic. I am really hoping the massage won't be THAT painful.
Tomorrow I will be new woman ..... and the carbo loading begins!
Happy eating all xx
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Comments (11)
ClareVR 'Hope you enjoy your massage, I am sure you will feel great after it - very jealous in fact! Still giggling about the John Inverdale effect...however I am sure I will get my comeuppance later when something sets me off!' added 21st Apr 2010
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Firefly123 'Great post, Sue, but my oh my your mind is working overtime! I think we're all (well us girls, anyway) are a bit emotional at the moment and I'm sure I'll be in floods of tears at the end of the race! I hope the massage isn't too painful - and I left you loads of freebies at the expo!!' added 21st Apr 2010
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greenwelly 'Sue, I LOVE your blog posts. Its so funny listening to the requests that your daughters make in the wee hours of the morning, because I remember being exactly the same when I was little, I used to scream out for my mummy to come and take me to the loo and I used to have the same weird obsession about the door being just ajar and measured to the exact millimetre... very odd. Anyway, i turned out ok (I think) so I'm sure your girls will too! And I agree with yoou about these short runs during the taper being quite hard, I've slogged through all of mine and am glad I'm not alone. Hope you enjoy your massage, I haven't tried one yet either. ' added 21st Apr 2010
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Russell_Nimbus 'Good luck on Sunday. They think it might reach 21 now. You're not the only one having nightmares. I've been worring about forgetting my ID and registration form for months! Remember to bring some suntan lotion!' added 21st Apr 2010
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daveredrock 'Ha! That sounds pretty much my last two nights' sleep exactly! Hope you manage to stay dry eyed through the last few days, although I bet you don't! Good luck on the day :o) ' added 21st Apr 2010
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lightninglucy1 'I am freaking out about the heat. Can only run about half an hour if it's hot! Totally relate to your night disturbances - I have three small boys who seem to plot ways to wake me in the night! Hope the massage leads to a good night's sleep. Best of luck Sunday. I am in pen 8 of blue start. ' added 21st Apr 2010
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squa25 'Haha that was funny. Had me laughing out loud at the bus stop! Enjoy the massage, you can enjoy the fact that it's your living room and you're not getting naked at the expo. Imagine the nightmares that might bring on?! There were a few bare botties out there. Rather them than me!' added 21st Apr 2010
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glen_b 'Superb post, good to know I am not the only one with kids who don't understand how much we need our sleep this week! I hope the neighbours are still talking to you. And I will also do you a deal as I have just looked at your Justgiving page, if you are still short of your target at the weekend I personally will make up the shortfall on Monday (you need about £2.50!).' added 21st Apr 2010
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gunes 'Hope you enjoy your massage,I think they are great and would have one once a week if I could afford to. Brilliant blog again,and cant wait to hear all about it when it's all over, I will miss your blogs on here they really make my day reading them, and make me laugh. But at least we can all keep in touch on FB :)' added 21st Apr 2010
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simonedumergue 'lol - you sound just like I was last year!! This year I feel more excited than freaked. Having said that, I just watched the late weather news and it now says 22 degrees for Sunday. Aaarrrrrrrgh!! Now I am freaked out by that. Scary temperature! You could write a book about that goldfish saga - all the elements of intrigue, drama and murder (OK not murder, but untimely demise!) I did laugh about the 'door gap' - my five year old daughter is exactly the same!!' added 21st Apr 2010
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Kendlef 'ahh bless, poor you, im having anxiety dreams too, mine are all about getting to london though now as alex has hurt his knee and so ill be doing all of the driving there and back and am dreading it :( enjoy the massage, mine was great, thinkin of treatin myself to another one once its all over :D' added 22nd Apr 2010
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